Today we’d like to introduce you to Shā Sparks.
Hi Shā, so excited to have you with us today. What can you tell us about your story?
After being able to walk away from an abusive relationship, I knew that I had to heal. I asked myself a couple of questions that were pivotal in how my life has shaped since then. Knowing the statistics of domestic abuse survivors is that most go back to their abuser and/or find another person just like them. With that kind of odds stacked against me, I knew that I needed to know what made this person attractive to me in the first place and what made me stay?
More importantly, I asked myself, “what is it that I need to know that I don’t know in order to move forward?” To find the answer, I needed to invest in myself to heal in all the modalities necessary it took to heal. I went to counselors, coaches, read books, listened to podcasts, and did lots of research. Most of all, I took action, stepped out of my comfort zone by trying new things, and learned more about myself than I ever have.
Within six months of my healing process, five different ladies shared their stories with me about their own abuse or manipulation that they had been experiencing in their relationships. I shared with them what I wished someone had shared with me and they either broke it off immediately with their partner or I listened and encouraged them until they did.
It wasn’t until the last woman left her long-term boyfriend that I realized that my pain had a purpose. Because I had been in an abusive relationship and healed, now I had a calling to help others do the same. As I reflect on that time of my life, I began to realize that my own personal trauma was transformed into a treasure by helping someone else.
During my healing journey, I started to see just how many obstacles I have had to overcome in my lifetime. I had experienced abuse as a child, was bullied, became a bully, teenage alcoholic, had anger issues, depression, and low self-worth. When diving deeper into the reason that I had become a bully, I really began to understand how to hurt people hurt people.
That sparked a fire inside me that made me think even more about what is it that I don’t know. And started to get really curious if the opposite of hurt people, hurt people. Do empowered people empower people? The excitement that grew out of that curiosity lit and continues to light me on fire to hear other people’s stories about how they hit an obstacle, invested in themselves, and then naturally started empowering others.
Since then, I have gotten certified as a fearless living coach and trainer, written books, started The Power of Investing in People podcast, and became a speaker. To share the experience of empowered people empowering people.
Can you talk to us a bit about the challenges and lessons you’ve learned along the way? Looking back would you say it’s been easy or smooth in retrospect?
Fear has gotten in the way every step along my way. From imposter syndrome, self-doubt, overthinking, procrastination to negative self-talk. Sometimes, fear would show up on a daily and minute-to-minute basis. I had to learn how to move through the fear when it showed.
I had to learn to ask for support. I had to learn how to love in a healthy way. I had to learn to be vulnerable. None of this was easy. However, I knew it was necessary. And I would repeat this question to myself, “how do you eat an elephant? One bite at a time.”
If I wanted to be something I had ever been or ever seen before then I had to do things that I hadn’t done before. And it all came down to learning to be vulnerable. That was a particularly difficult one to comprehend. Being vulnerable was extremely scary to me and completely new. Being vulnerable was the biggest risk that I had ever taken until then.
Thanks for sharing that. So, maybe next you can tell us a bit more about your business?
As a coach and trainer, I personally, guide leaders in the military and business industries to step out of their comfort zone to embody skills and tools to lead with emotional intelligence and intellect through my Spark Your ALPHA™️ program.
Also, we offer multimedia platforms for heroes of all types to spark empowerment by sharing their voices in a podcast or book. Our purpose is to be an advocate for Veterans, Autism, Domestic Violence Survivors, and Bullying for shifting the narrative from PTSD to PTGrowth.
We offer to coach and consult for personal and business on podcasting, writing and publishing books, how your fear shows up, leadership, transition from military to civilian life, transition from one career to another, and mediation services.
What matters most to you? Why?
What matters most to me is that people see that we have a choice. We don’t have to stay in situations that no longer serve us in a positive and loving way. Whether that’s a job, relationship, or mindset. We always have a choice.
Why this matters most is because, for most of my life, I didn’t believe that I had a choice. I thought that I “made my bed and now I had to lie in it”.
Six months before my dad passed away, he shared with me his journey of when he was drafted to Korea. Up until that moment, I thought he had enlisted. And as he carefully shared some of his experience, he said something that permeated my soul. He said, “I didn’t have a choice.” Those words struck me like a shock to my system. I thought how many times have I said that to myself.
I definitely know that I said that to myself back when I was in that abusive relationship. I was just waiting for him to kill me. If my story can shift someone’s fear-based mindset of believing that they don’t have a choice to understand that they do, in fact, have lots of choices, then that is my “why”.
- Email: firstname.lastname@example.org
- Website: shasparks.com
- Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/iamshasparks/
- Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/iamshasparks
- Twitter: https://twitter.com/iamshasparks
- Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/c/ShaSparks
- Other: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/the-power-of-investing-in-people-with-sha-sparks/id1482282226