Today we’d like to introduce you to Kari Driskell.
Hi Kari, we’re thrilled to have a chance to learn your story today. So, before we get into specifics, maybe you can briefly walk us through how you got to where you are today?
Once upon a time, I was a middle school math teacher. My husband Eric was also a teacher at Blue Valley High School – and a football & track coach.
We had two daughters we made the decision for me to stay at home with them in 2008. I was already in direct sales and so I was doing more of that after I left teaching. Needing the flexibility to stay at home with our girls grew especially once Eric became the head football coach in 2010. So, I started doing more and more sales from Facebook and utilizing video.
I saw a need and started a video editing business for direct sellers in 2014 called Driskotech – still working from home – and that took off.
In February of 2017, Eric died unexpectedly and suddenly of a massive brain aneurysm.
It was all over the news, you may have seen it – football coach died.
He was a bit of a local celebrity in the area, metro, and even in the high school coaching community.
He was 43, I was 38, and our girls were 8 and 11 at the time.
I couldn’t go back to work. I couldn’t do anything, really.
My heart was broken.
And I was surprised at how I couldn’t pull myself out of my despair.
I started learning about all the things – how to be and do and feel better after his death.
They all helped for a little while. But at the end of the day, Eric was still dead.
And in the quiet of the night – and any other times of the day – I was consumed by grief, regret, guilt, and by the future, we were never going to have.
Yet, I thought I was good. I thought I was managing. This was supposed to be my “new normal” – I’d just be sad all the time and kinda function again.
I wanted to help others – to tell our story, to share hope after significant loss, and to continue to help and teach people.
I’m a teacher at heart.
In my online searches, I stumbled upon The Grief Recovery Method®. It was an action-based program that was supposed to help me heal my broken heart. And thought, “Why the hell not; I’ve not nothing to lose at this point.”
But it was a game-changer.
It helped me release my regret, guilt, and pain of my grief so I could get my sense of aliveness back.
So, when I thought “I was good,” I really wasn’t – and I see that now… I feel it!
And so now, that’s what I do now.
I’m an Advanced Grief Recovery Method Specialist® and I also got certified as a Life Coach for Widows.
I do heartwork and headwork.
Would you say it’s been a smooth road, and if not, what are some of the biggest challenges you’ve faced along the way?
Before Eric died, I had rose-colored glasses. The worst part of my day was spilled coffee creamer, conflicted family schedules, or a loss football game from Friday night.
But I welcomed the challenges. We could overcome.
I was always optimistic – maybe a little too much…
Naive. Toxic positivity maybe? I see it in my Facebook memories…
After Eric died, I eventually recognized how I had become a workaholic with my video business, Driskotech. And with our kids being the ages of 8 and 11, our lives were busy. And Eric dove deeper into his work.
I see this now… my contribution to our marriage not being at its peak when he died.
But I had blamed football. I was mad at Eric.
And so I suffered from that. Because we really did have a fantastic marriage. But marriages go up and down in the long haul. We would have been okay, I know that, but when he died we were in a romantic valley.
So, dealing with that emotionally was difficult.
I also struggled in my grief because I had convinced myself that I had manifested Eric’s death in some way. The day that he died I was mad at him for not helping with the kids when I was painting a bedroom. And I had the thought, “God knows if anything were to happen to Eric I’d be okay; look at me now doing it all by myself.”
2-hours later I got a phone call that said Eric was breathing, hurry quick.
So, I had to emotionally overcome that.
All of the things I had used to get out of a funk in my previous life weren’t working now – and so I felt kinda stuck in my grief. I didn’t know how to get out of that, but I wanted to and I needed to – for me and for the girls – and because I knew Eric would want me to.
I also think that all entrepreneurs struggle with self-doubt when starting a new business – even when they are most confident.
But I try to train my brain to continue with this work with the thought, “I started a successful small business out of nothing once before – I know what I’m doing – I will do it again.”
Mindset and heartbreak have been my biggest obstacles.
Can you tell our readers more about what you do and what you think sets you apart from others?
I market to widows because that’s what I am and what I know from personal experience, but I work with anyone who is ready to do and be and feel better after a significant loss. And there are over 40 different types of losses where you can experience grief!
Grief is incredibly painful. It’s heartbreak, literally. And it manifests into physical symptoms.
You are also supposed to grieve. But not forever.
Actively grieving interferes with daily life; sleep and eating patterns, concentration, your immune system, and more. And unresolved grief can affect every aspect of your life regardless of whether or not you know it or not. It looks like a lack of patience, a chip on your shoulder, overreacting, and even chronic illness.
Society does not only NOT prepare us for the inevitable, grief; but they also give us misinformation on how to deal with grief.
I provide a safe space to say all the crazy thoughts that you think and feel in grief and don’t dismiss them. Your broken heart has made sense of it, even if you know it’s not logical.
I know because I’ve been there, too.
And I’m on the other side of it.
I’m told that I’m the person who says the thing that you might be thinking or you’re too afraid to say.
Unfiltered grief.
I offer real hope – not the “he’s in a better place” bullshit and other unhelpful things people tell us.
What matters most to you? Why?
That people know that this kind of help exists.
I didn’t.
I knew there were grief groups, help through my church, and therapists – but this work is different.
And so that’s why I continue to share my story in hopes that it reaches more and more people.
Grievers need to know there’s hope after a significant loss.
And they need to know the truth – that time doesn’t heal anything and you’re not supposed to grieve forever.
There’s a difference between grieving, mourning, and missing your person.
Contact Info:
- Email: [email protected]
- Website: KariDriskell.com
- Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/thekaridriskell/
- Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/KariDriskellLLC/
