Today we’d like to introduce you to Rachel Blankenship
Hi Rachel, it’s an honor to have you on the platform. Thanks for taking the time to share your story with us – to start maybe you can share some of your backstory with our readers?
While earning a bachelor’s in history I worked at a flower shop. After graduating, I bought the flower shop. In 2005 I had coordinated a very large event in my hometown. During the event a gentleman approached me and asked me if I was the event coordinator, and I immediately engaged him as a potential client. After about 20 mins of discussion, he asked…”Have you ever thought about working in Law?” This confused me…. he explained that he was looking for a trial assistant to help with a very large jury trial he had pending. I laughed until he told me what the pay for this one job would be. I worked the trial with him and ended up closing my business in 2007 and going into law full time. I graduated in 2009 with a degree in legal studies and have continued my education taking as many additional classes as I can afford each year. I have the college credits to earn my JD but life took me in a different direction, and I am happy NOT to be an attorney. In 2019 after spending years in family law as a litigation paralegal, I attended a training on mediation and began a new journey. I am currently State accredited in both KS and MO as a Domestic, Special Education and Bioethic mediator.
My dad was diagnosed with an aggressive cancer in March of 2022 and died that July. I spent that time with him and my family. When we went to plan his service all we had to do was give the funeral director our instructions and choose an urn. The director was very taken aback. He informed me that no one ever comes in so organized. At the time I didn’t think much about that because I am a very organized person. But that statement stayed with me. We spent about 15 mins in the funeral home that day. I actually spent more time ordering the flowers for his memorial.
During this time, I met Nichole Staab. Nicole is an End of Life Doula. She helped me with emotional support and empathy. While Niki and I were getting to know each other we continued to circle back to the thought of “What do people do who don’t know what we know?” My family and I spent every minute with my father, no one was running around trying to get POAs signed or figure out what to do with the financial accounts, I had all that done for my parents in 2017. We spent our days with my father planning how he wanted to spend his last days and moments. It finally registered with me that not many people get this privilege.
In March 2023, Niki and I founded Rings of Care a nonprofit organization designed to support informal and family caregivers & those who don’t have a caregiver. In April of 2023 Niki and I pitched our program at the UMKC Bloch School of Management shark tank style competition and won first place. This win allowed us to develop the portal and grow our program while providing free services to clients.
Would you say it’s been a smooth road, and if not what are some of the biggest challenges you’ve faced along the way?
I didn’t do anything traditionally, LOL and I enjoyed the road that got me here, but it has had its challenges. I think one of the biggest struggles for me was being female, especially when I was younger. I, to this day, get frustrated when I get dismissed or bypassed because I don’t look like someone who should be in the room. My dad was a welder and my mother a secretary. We lived a solid middle-class lifestyle. I paid my way through private high school and college. I was the first in my family to earn a college degree and what my parents afforded me was unconditional support and guidance.
I remember people would call my parents and “tell on me” if they didn’t like the service they received or if they thought I was “too much” when I had an opinion. In 1998 I was 24 and working on the planning committee for the Millennial Celebration that the City (not KC) was holding. One of the city officials knew my family. Following one of the meetings where I had specifically argued against an idea that was too costly this (50+ white male) individual called my dad and told him I would do better in life if I would be less argumentative and work with what the elders in the room where offering. My dad laughed at him and asked him if I were a man would they be having that conversation. In another instance, I can remember someone I was negotiating a contract with asking me to go get my dad. When my dad heard this, he came with me the next day and when the man asked dad if “I was always like this” my dad’s response was “that sounds like an extra 20% on top to me, to avoid a discrimination allegation”.
While times have changed over the 30 plus years I have been in business, I still enter most rooms as one of very few females and encounter men who think that they can intimidate me. I also know that my being a white female gives me privilege and my goal in any room is make sure that every ounce of privilege that may provide me I use to bring others without that privilege to the table with me.
Thanks – so what else should our readers know about Rings of Care?
We have developed programs or rings specific to the needs of individual communities as well as a portal that provides a communication tool and calendaring tool securely designed to share information and request help with tasks from each patient’s immediate family or friends.
Another key part of what we do is education. Teaching people how to plan for health crisis and have compassionate conversations with their loved ones. remember how we are taught that we don’t talk about politics and religion? We also don’t talk about health crisis and death. We have to normalize these topics in order for loved ones to know each other’s wishes. Did you know that after you lose a loved one and you go to plan their funeral, there are at least 88 separate decisions you will be making? All while you are grieving your loss. When you have these conversations with your loved ones and prepare for the inevitable you are giving them a gift. If my dad had not done that, my family and I would not have been able to be with him in the moment while he passed. That was a GIFT.
Additionally, we have multiple programs that provide direct support including:
KC End of Life. KCEOL is a group of doulas who provide their services for free,
We have a ring specific to LGBTQIA community members and provide free Powers of Attorney for both General and Health care decisions. Our neighbors, who have chosen family, need to have people speaking for them in these crisis moments that will honor their personal life choices, and
We are developing a ring that places a certified Community Health Care Worker with each client. The CHW acts at the direction or and on behalf of the client and their family coordinating services from researching resources to coordinating doctor’s appointments all designed to help the informal or family caregiver reduce their stress and lighten their load so they can focus on their loved one.
To our knowledge we are the only program like this in the Country. There is only one other EOL Doula program and that is in CO.
For me the portal is the tool I am the proudest of. Niki is really the designer as my technological prowess is less than ideal. She worked with Trisha Keightley at WebWorx and together they created a tool that has surpassed our vision. The tool is free to anyone who wants to use it. You as the primary owner receive a one of kind code to share with you family and friend. They can then register to be a volunteer. Once they enter your code, they have access to your calendar and narrative. No one can see the calendar or narrative without your personalized code. The care giver is empowered to ask for help on tasks that they are comfortable with having someone else take on and can provide updates ion one location for all to see.
What has struck me is that our portal is not just being used by caregivers for the elderly. We have families with children who have disabilities and even a domestic violence shelter using the portal. I love this! Know that something so simple has been helping people in a variety of circumstances is extremely rewarding.
Any big plans?
I am really looking forward to getting programs up and going specific to diagnosis. A ring for Lupus, Cancer, kids with disabilities, adults with disabilities, and growing our resources for these families.
I am also passionate about continuing to advocate for the change we need in our community to support these varied groups.
Informal and Family Caregivers provide BILLIONS of dollars in free care annual and have the least number of resources available to them. I have been working on the MO Master Plan on Aging on a Senate Subcommittee specific to Informal and Family Caregivers. MO is one of 6 – SIX states that is actually working to develop a plan for our aging population. By the year 2030 they are estimating that the 65+ population will outnumber the 18 and under population. Everyday 8000 baby boomers turn 65 nationally! This is going to impact every aspect of our country. I spoke recently with an economist employed by the KC branch of the Federal Reserve. When I asked him what the Feds had been discussing to address this shift economically, he was unable to answer my question. People in every area of our community need to be thinking about how this looks for them. We do not have enough professional caregivers, we do not have enough AFFORDABLE caregivers, employers to need shift their approach to Paid Family Leave or they are going to lose valuable employees. As a sandwich caregiver I have time off needs for my child and my mother – there are millions of sandwich caregivers, and that number is growing every day.
Bringing awareness to the need prior to the need so we can plan accordingly has always been my passion. I often start my lecture or testimony off by reminding people in my very inappropriately funny way that guess what we are all getting older and we will all die. If we spend time to plan a birth, a birthday party, a wedding why don’t we plan for health crisis and death? Its not a fun or sexy topic but it is inevitable.
Pricing:
- FREE
Contact Info:
- Website: https://www.ringsofcare.org
- Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/ringsofcare
- Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/RingsofCareKC
- LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/rings-of-care-inc-0a4083258/
